Queen of the dark chamber

The following is an excerpt from “The Argument from Religious Experience” by Kai-Man Kwan in the book The Blackwell Companion to Natural Theology (p 499):

Christiana Tsai was a Chinese lady who was born into a traditional Chinese society in the nineteenth century. She came from a Chinese family that was antagonistic toward Christianity, but she was converted after such an experience: one day she was playing in the backyard, and she noticed a stone that looked very smooth on the surface. She turned it over by a stick and discovered that there was a big lizard and many bugs under the stone. Suddenly, she heard a voice in her heart: “You are just like this stone, looking beautiful from the outside but full of evil inside!” She knelt down and prayed to God for forgiveness. Immediately, she found peace and felt that the burden of sin on her was lifted. Since then, the world appeared to her as the Lord’s beautiful garden. She found a source of love in her heart, and felt that even the inanimate objects in the surroundings were singing praise to the Creator with her.

She shared the gospel with friends and relatives and many were converted as well. However, her mother was very resistant and was addicted to opium. One night, her mother had a vision of Jesus appearing in front of her in His glory. After that, her mother was also converted and found it easy to quit opium altogether. One time, Tsai was struggling over a decision concerning her relationship with her boyfriend. Suddenly, she seemed to see Jesus in Gethsemane. She was filled with the Holy Spirit. She felt the pain of Christ and knew that Christ could also understand her pain. She decided to let go of that relationship. Since then, she felt that the love of the Lord had never left her, and her communion with Him became sweeter and sweeter. However, the most severe trial was still to come.

One day a strange disease suddenly started to inflict immense sufferings on her. Even light would make her feel like being stabbed by a knife. For many days she just could not eat, move, speak, or open her eyes. Doctors said she would die soon. However, she saw a vision of a beautiful crown rising up to heaven one night, but a voice told her it was not yet the time. Then she started to recover. To cut the story short, although she survived the sickness, she had to stay in the dark chamber for the next 24 years, and tremendous pain still visited her. However, through such a long period and in darkness, she continued to feel strongly the love of God and the illumination of His light. She continued to have communion with God, and her life did show a kind of peace and joy that were almost palpable for her visitors. Many of them would say they could see God in her life.3


3. This story is told in Tsai (1953) [i.e. Queen of the Dark Chamber], and my account is extracted from the Chinese version of this book (Tsai 2000).


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